Where we challenge what you won't say or you don't know…yet

Posts tagged ‘Life’

6 Most Influential

The lists have been popping up all over the place.Influence

  • Top influencers in business
  • Top influencers on Twitter
  • Top 5000 influencers

All of the influential lists are created with some sort of guidelines. The challenge is that someone who is influential to you might not be influential to me or anyone else.

The dictionary tells us that influence is defined as: the capacity or power of persons or things to be a compelling force on or produce effects on the actions, behavior, opinions,etc…of others

Keeping all of that in mind, let’s now look at the people who should be influencers in your life. There is no scientific fact to this study at all. This is built from asking questions and listening closely to answers.

Remember as you work through this list, someone with influence, doesn’t mean they are a role model for you.

Here are the people who should in some way be on Your Most Influential list…

1) Your mom or dad (it is acceptable to have parents listed as one on your list or split them if you want)
Either one of your parents already made this list. They are either a person that you want to be like, or a person you don’t want to be like. Whichever it might be, they have influenced you every step of your life and shaped you to the person that you are today. One or both of your parents clearly have been a compelling force on you.

2) Your spouse/partner
Married or not married, there has been that partner along the way that influenced the way you looked at something. Did they open your mind to a different way of thinking? Did they have any effects on your actions, behavior or opinions?
Hopefully you are blessed that person became your spouse/partner and is still there doing this for you today.

3)A teacher
We all have had “that” teacher in our life that has been a huge influence leading you to where you are today. Maybe they pushed you harder than any other teacher because they saw something in you. Maybe they opened a door to an opportunity in your life. Maybe they introduced you to something that has become your passion.
Maybe you were lucky and it was your grade 1 teacher or maybe this came later in life and was a professor you had in university.

4)Best friend
You shouldn’t have to think too hard to figure this one out. This is the person that when you can’t call your spouse or your parents because you got in real trouble you will reach out to call. This person might actually have had the most influence on you and have changed your opinion on many different topics over the years.
We hope that you have this person in your life. Maybe it is also your spouse or one of your parents.

5)Work mate
This might be your boss. This could be the person at the cubicle beside you. Someone that makes you want to make that extra call, send that extra email, and stay those few extra moments each day. This person is clearly a compelling force on you.

6)Author/Speaker/Coach/Athlete
One of these people has been influential to you. Something you have read or heard or watched them do has had an impact on your actions. Do you work out harder because you see an athlete do something you know you can do? Do you live your life by a message that you got from a book you read? Were you moved to action from a presentation by a fantastic speaker at a conference or event?

Now you have a list of who should be on Your Most Influential list and stop chasing the people who are on someone else’s list!

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Chadalyst – Take a moment and write your list. Who is the person that fits each one of these six categories? And who else still should be added to your list? Reach out and thank these people for the influence they have had on your life.

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Play With a Full Deck

New Year’s resolutions…forget about them!
Instead we are here to help make this next year aces! There are 52 weeks in the year and 52 cards in a playing deck. Our goal is to make sure we are all playing with a full deck.

full deck

Often we start the year thinking about how to improve our business or how to improve our relationships or how to improve other external things. Our list gets long and overwhelming and we don’t accomplish what we set out to achieve. All of these things can be improved if we all start from the inside out.

Our goal has and always will be to help our readers grow. Thank you for being one of those readers and subscribers to this blog.

Each of our blogs ends with a Chadalyst, a thing that precipitates an event or change from Chad, and this blog is filled with them.

Let’s get to the challengeThere are 52 things on this list. We assigned a playing card to each one, randomly draw a card from a deck once a week and start working on the matching item. Challenge yourself to achieve as many of these as possible in the next year. These are in no specific order. heart

Hearts

Ace of Hearts Run a 5K
A short 3 mile run is something you can get up to speed for quickly. This isn’t a race, it is an experience. Donate some money to a good cause, get some great exercise and feel good inside and out.

2 of HeartsClean your closet
There are so many things in your closet that you don’t wear anymore and probably never will again. If you didn’t wear something over the past 12 months, clean it out of the closet and donate it. You will feel good inside and be able to get some new clothes to look good on the outside.

3 of Hearts Take a yoga class
Get your brain centered, get your body doing things you never thought possible. Yoga will help you get in shape and will help you find peace.

4 of Hearts Unplug for a weekend
We have become dependent upon technology. For a weekend, leave your phone behind. Don’t check in, don’t post, and don’t tweet. You deserve a weekend without the beeps and tweets.

5 of Hearts Help at a homeless shelter
There are others in need. Taking some time to donate time and help those less fortunate will help us all appreciate what we have and what we take for granted

6 of Hearts Read a self-help book
We all think we have it together and no matter how great things are, there are always other ways to look at anything. Take a moment and find a book to help us communicate better, help us understand each other better or whatever challenge you face.

7 of Hearts Read a fiction book and escape
Another way to unplug is to pick up a book and escape. There is nothing as powerful as our imagination and reading a fiction book lets us use that imagination. Who knows what new ideas you might find in a crime novel, a journey through time or a trip to another planet.

8 of Hearts Call someone
There is someone who you have wanted to talk to. There is someone who you haven’t spoken to in a while. There is someone you should pick up the phone and call.

9 of Hearts Send a hand written card
Emails and Facebook messages are great ways to stay in touch with people without much effort. Take a moment and show someone that they are important enough for you to hand write them a note or letter. Plus, isn’t it nice to get something in the mail other than a bill?

10 of Hearts Pay for the person behind you at the drive thru
We often go through the drive thru to start our day, on a busy lunch or to bring home dinner at the end of a long day with no time to cook. That means the person behind us is probably in the same boat. Start someone’s day on a high note, help someone else in a rush or make someone’s evening a little bit better.

Jack of Hearts Eat something new
Don’t ask what it is, just taste something that you have never eaten before. Open your mind and heart and in this case, your palate. You may never know what you enjoy once you get over what it is you are eating.

Queen of Hearts Attend a dance class
Even for those that are rhythmically challenged, this is a great way to connect with your life dance partner and have some laughs.

King of Hearts Learn a language
It is a challenge and will take more than a week to get this one done. Get started on something you have always wanted to do (we all do) and think of how it will make you a better person.

clubClubs

Ace of ClubsTry a new recipe
We all get set in our ways and make the same 5-10 meals with very little change. Having broccoli instead of green beans is not a different meal. Grab a cookbook, ask a friend or even Google it. Find something new to make and surprise yourself.

2 of ClubsTake a 3 day weekend with someone important
One of the most valuable things you can give to someone is time. It is one of the things that we are limited on having and we never know when we have run out. Take a break and take a spouse, a family member or a friend and get out-of-town together.

3 of ClubsTake a nap
Who doesn’t want one of these? We all go go go and feel that a nap is something we don’t have the time for. Take the time and take a nap.

4 of ClubsBuild something
This could be something small like a(an) ______ all the way up to a new deck on the back of your home. Enjoy the feeling of creation and being able to appreciate your work for years to come.

5 of ClubsNo desserts
For some this is simple and for others a challenge. Go a week and have no desserts. That means no cookies at the office and no samples at the store. This might not be the best item to attempt to check off the list during the holiday season.

6 of ClubsReach 10,000 steps
Looking to improve your health in one of the easiest ways, walk 10,000 steps in a day. Pace back and forth while you are on the phone. Stretch your legs when you have a moment. Take a walk around the block. Reach 10,000 steps on a regular basis and your body will thank you.

7 of ClubsClean your garage
The first thing most people see when they get home is the garage. If you are not seeing yours, it is a good bet that it is too full and too much of a mess for you to use it. Start with one box at a time and after a box a day you will start to see changes in your garage and reclaim an area of your home.

8 of ClubsJournal
Clear your mind at the end of the day. Capture your thoughts, feelings and experiences in a private place for you or in a place that you can one day pass to someone else to know what it was that you were going through. Journaling will capture it all and help you sleep better.

9 of ClubsNo TV
Turn off the tube! Pull out a book (see items #__ and #___) play a board game, go for a walk. Whatever you do if you turn off the television you will quickly reclaim many hours of your week

10 of ClubsBe a kid again
Jump on a skate board. Go play in an arcade. Do something that reminds you of when you were a kid and having happy times. We all have our inner child waiting to come out and play.

Jack of ClubsSave an animal
Want to take a big leap on this one, go adopt an animal. You will wonder if you saved it or if it saved you. If you are not ready to take on the additional responsibility, take some time and volunteer at the local animal shelter. You will feel wonderful at the end of the day.

Queen of ClubsPlant a tree
A tree might be a little big for your space. If you can’t plant a tree, bring something green to your home and pot some flowers. Help nature grow and watch how it makes you feel better

King of ClubsNew hairstyle
Be daring. Got long hair, go cut it short. If you have always have had short hair, grow it out. Losing your hair (we know of what we speak) just take the plunge and shave it off.

diamondDiamonds

Ace of DiamondsGet extreme
Jump from a plane (with a parachute please) Go Scuba diving. Compete in a marathon. Do something this next year that reminds you the thrill that life can share when you push yourself to something extreme.

2 of DiamondsInterview a role model
Want to grow in many ways this year? Take a moment and interview a role model. Find someone doing something that you want to do. Someone that will be happy to share with you what they know. Remember that you are also a role model to others and be ready to continue to share that information

3 of DiamondsTake a hike
Get outside and breathe in some fresh air while exploring nature and getting some exercise. Sounds like a perfect way to clear your head for a day

4 of DiamondsPerform a random act of kindness
Hopefully you do this often. Hold a door open, help someone with full hands from a store, and shovel a driveway of a neighbor. Whatever it is you do, be intentional about finding someone to help

5 of DiamondsShop local
Support your local stores. Big box stores might have larger selections and it is our local stores that add culture to our towns. Get your coffee someplace local. Buy your next book from a local bookstore. Shop local and help your town.

6 of DiamondsAttend a live sporting event
Support your local team in any professional sport or even at the college level. Get out there, unwind and take in competition at its finest.

7 of DiamondsTake the stairs and skip all elevators/escalators
Use an extra moment and climb the stairs and get your blood pumping that little bit extra. You never know, you might start a trend.

8 of DiamondsDiscover a new band
Get out of your comfort zone of listening to the same groups again and again. Ask friends for suggestions, check out what Pandora shows as similar or dive into iTunes and find something different and push your mind.

9 of DiamondsSubscribe to a magazine for someone
Magazines are great learning tools. They bring information right to your mailbox monthly. Find a magazine you think someone would enjoy and send a subscription to them. They will think of you monthly.

10 of DiamondsTake a vacation
You’ve earned it. OK, maybe you haven’t and you should still take one. Just before a vacation we get focused and busy at work and then on a vacation we can unplug, unwind and create a memory that we otherwise would have missed

Jack of DiamondsLeave a huge tip
Ever work in the service industry? If you have you know that you can change someone’s day with an unexpectedly large tip. Never worked in the service industry, you should and then you would understand.

Queen of DiamondsMake friends with someone new
Meet your children’s friend’s parents. Meet someone you see at the coffee shop each morning. Make a new friend and see what doors open for both of you.

King of DiamondsSay thank you
You do this all the time as second nature (we hope) Be intentional about saying thank you to someone (or a group of some ones) that have impacted your life. Gratitude goes a long way

spadeSpades

Ace of SpadesSing karaoke
You might not be able to sing. You might have stage fright. Don’t worry most of the people who are there can’t sing either. Relax and enjoy a night of getting uncomfortable.

2 of SpadesSupport the arts
Every town has a local theatre. Take in a dance performance or a play that is going on. Encourage those that invest their time and talents and experience something magical

3 of SpadesCreate a work of art
Pull out those paints. Get some pencils and start sketching. You don’t have to make something to frame, just create and find amazing new answers to questions you have been stuck on.

4 of SpadesSpend a day with a child
Take your child for a day of just the two of you. Don’t have a child, borrow a niece or nephew. Children need role models and relationships. Take a day and work on developing yours.

5 of SpadesDownload a new app
Who knows what app. Open up the app store on your phone and download the top suggested or top free or go looking for an app that can help solve a problem you have. Technology is everywhere so embrace it.

6 of SpadesTake a friend out to dinner
Everyone eats. Take a friend and spend a meal together. Catch up, talk about life, and eat great food. You will be happy you did.

7 of SpadesGo on a road trip
Everywhere in the country has someplace close enough to make for a fun road trip. Jump in the car and off you go to create a memory and experience an adventure.

8 of SpadesLearn more about something you are interested in
With the growth of Google there is nothing out of reach anymore. Want to know more about Greek Mythology, Google it. Want to learn more about bridges, Google it. There is something you have wanted to know so take a moment and Google it.

9 of SpadesRepaint a room
Nothing will change a day more than a new color. Paint that bathroom, bedroom or office that you have been thinking about doing. It will give you a new lease on creativity.

10 of SpadesGive a gift to someone for no reason
We all feel better when we can make others feel better (believe it or not) Next time you see something that you know someone you know would enjoy, send it to them!

Jack of SpadesDrink water
Looking to improve your health and eat better, the first place to start is drinking those 8 cups of water a day. Get a bottle that holds 64oz and fill it. Drink it all before the day ends.

Queen of SpadesVisit an art gallery
Savor a moment surrounded by beautiful works of art and explore an art gallery. New thoughts will fill your mind and new solutions found

King of SpadesGo on a picnic
Nature is there for you to embrace and too often we enjoy nature out the window of our car or office. Grab your meal and grab a seat on the grass and enjoy a little time with Mother Nature. When was the last time you visited her?

Just draw one card from your deck a week and it will make for a wonderful year of growth and change. At the end of that year you will never be the same!

This challenge can be started at any time and does not have to start with a new year. Start today and good luck.

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Chadalyst Draw a card and get to it already!

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You Do Judge a Book by its Cover

Don’t judge a book by its cover is a very well-known idiom. We all understand that is means we should not prejudge something (or someone) by outward appearance. There is the challenge that comes with this statement…we all prejudge. We our a society of people who make up their minds before hand.

old book

We decide things like:

  • if a meal will be good based on how it looks
  • if a movie is worth seeing based on the trailer
  • if a person is worth working with based on their appearance
  • and if a book is worth reading based on the cover

The challenge isn’t to stop prejudging, as that could be the thing that keeps you out of harm and dangerous situations at times. The challenge is what do you do next?

Once you have prejudged do you close your mind to other options? Do you stop listening to the opinion of others? Are you set in stone on your judgement and do you refuse to move forward and look at other possible results?

David had no chance to beat Goliath and still walked away with a famous victory.

The 1980 USA Hockey team was not only prejudged not to win a gold medal, they weren’t figured to win any medal at the event.

There are many examples of prejudging that has come back to be proven wrong again and again.

Someone was too short, too tall, too thin, too large, not attractive enough, not dressed well enough. This list could go on and on. You have probably prejudged someone or something already today.

Remember that sometimes people hope to distract you with a beautiful cover to their book. Driving a luxury car, living in a large home or dressed to the latest fashions. These things also don’t tell you the full story.

Keep an open mind everywhere and with everyone. Remember to take a moment and at least read a few pages before deciding what the “book” is about

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Chadalyst the next time you prejudge (probably some time very soon) stop and think about it. Why are you prejudging and could there be another outcome?

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8 Key Lessons from Dad

We have all learned valuable lessons from our parents. Today we have a look at some of the lessons my dad had shared with me through my life.  Some of these lessons were positive and some were things to learn from. Either way, these lessons came from love and the school of hard knocks

LIFE ISN’T FAIR. This is a lesson that dad shared at least once a month. The good thing to know is that there are times that life is not fair and it is in your favor! If you want to know more about this check out this blog focused on this topic Life isn’t fair.

TREAT A WOMAN LIKE YOU WOULD WANT YOUR MOTHER TREATED. If you treat every woman the way that you would want people to treat your mother, the world will be a better place. This lesson comes down to how to be a gentleman and was a very important lesson to learn.

JUST PUT SOME DIRT ON IT. This is a lesson that dad shared anytime someone was hurt. Be tough and it won’t hurt as much if you just take a moment and rub some dirt on it. This lesson did change when speaking to a young girl. Instead of dirt it was put kisses all over it and the pain was gone. The lesson to take from this is think of something else and the pain will be gone.

YOU’RE NOT SICK, IT IS ALL IN YOUR HEAD. This is a lesson that probably wasn’t a great one to learn, as there are times your body is attempting to tell you something that you don’t listen to. This was a very valuable lesson in the power of mindset and that you can do anything you put your mind to, even overcome sickness.

READ READ AND THEN READ SOME MORE. Dad always had a book in his hand. It might have been the latest spy thriller or the newest business book to help push your thinking to the next level. Whichever it was he was reading it was a powerful lesson to always be expanding your thinking.

SPEND MONEY. Enjoy what you have. Have experiences. Create memories. All of that came with spending money and dad was good at that! This lesson might have been better learned if there was some balance to it and dad also taught how to save. Oh well, at least there are some great memories!

THE POINT OF CHILDREN ARE GRANDCHILDREN. This was a lesson that dad shared later in life. Maybe dad didn’t learn this one until later in life and therefore also taught the lesson of always be learning! There was nothing as important to dad as his grandchildren. Remember that as you wonder what happened to your children as they become know it all teenagers and adults. One day they will provide you with grandchildren and they will have to suffer their children growing up!

TAKE A LOT OF PHOTOS. Most memories of dad include a camera around his neck (cameras weren’t always built into phones) and snapping photos. Memories will be captured for ever with a simple click of a camera. Take those photos, look at those photos and remember the good times.

Thanks dad for all of these lessons. They will last forever and be passed on. You will never be forgotten. You were a great dad always filled with support even when it wasn’t clear.

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Chadalyst If you can, go thank your parents for the lessons they have taught you. Make sure you pass on your lessons to your next generation.

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Change – Are you ready for it?

Woody Allen is known for many things and credited as being the person that first said…If you want to make God laugh tell him your plans.

Ever plan a trip? What happens just before you leave? You get busy!
Ever plan a big event? What happens? The weather gets in the way or you find yourself under the weather.
Ever think you have it all set and ready to go? If I may be so bold as to quote God “HA HA that’s what you think”

This isn’t all bad and usually finds us in a place that we should have been instead of where we thought we were going.

Have a goal. Have a target. Have a plan. Just be ready for changes to come your way.

These changes, these challenges and these moments are what develop our character and help us to find out who we really are.

Are you the person that is calm under pressure or the one that breaks down and ends up in the corner not sure what to do? Are you on that thrives on the unexpected or one that needs things to go as planned? Are you someone who can be truly counted on by those that would need you?

Are you ready for your plans to be changed at a moments notice? Here are a few things you can do to be as ready as possible…
1) Take a moment to tell those in your life that are important to you how you feel. This way you will never regret if something is taken from you
2) Forget about your Bucket List – that is a list of things you will do “one of these days” Instead look at your list and figure out your Carousel Rings on that list and grab them! Not sure what your carousel rings are just check out this past posting

3) Journal all of it! Your thoughts, your feelings, your memories. Capture them someplace that you will have them forever and be able to share them with those closest to you.

Do these things and when your plans are changed be it a little thing or a big thing you will be able to deal with it better!

Chadalyst – Be ready for change – if it can happen, it will happen when you are least ready for it. How will you prepare?

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You are someone’s role model

You are a role model.

This isn’t a job position that you apply for.

There is no application that you had to have filled out.

Someone out there is watching you and learning from you with everything that you are doing.

You might not even know who it is that is paying attention to you. You might not have any idea when they are watching you.

You are always on duty and there is no end to this shift.

  • You might be a mentor to a child in your home watching what you choose as priorities.
  • You might be a mentor to someone at work watching to see what level of achievement you are setting
  • You might be a mentor to a someone who you don’t really know and they watch everything you do online

It could be someone in your neighborhood, someone at a store you stop at frequently or even a pet in your household that learns from your mood and temper. You might never know who it is and it might be more than one person.

How can you set a good example and be the role model you want to be?

  • Do a good deed by holding a door open for someone and maybe it sends a message to someone who sees it happen as well as the person you assisted.
  • Pay for the car behind you at the drive through window and you could impact the server at the window and the people in the car behind you.
  • Give a moment to help feed the homeless and you are setting an example for everyone in your life as well as being a mentor to everyone there to eat.

The question to ask yourself with every action you choose is, what sort of example are you setting for others?

Chadalyst – Stop and take a moment to think of someone who you know you are a mentor to. What message are you sending them? Is it the message you want them to remember?

Join Ember Seminars on Facebook and on Twitter and share your thoughts.

T.G.I.F and all the other days

We hear T.G.I.F. weekly. Heck, there is even a restaurant that uses it as their name.

Sadly this is a message that we hear so often we have come to accept it as a truth. We are here to say that this is a truth that we must change!

As kids we go to school and look forward to the weekend to be able to play, stop listening to teachers and have more time to hang out with our friends. We looked forward to a break from the homework, the tests and the routine that school put upon us.

As we reach college the days all start to blend together between classes and the job that we have also taken on and we don’t know which way is up!

Then we enter the world of the employed. We have been taught that Friday is the best day as it brings the week to the end. If you have other days of the week off you never say T.G.I.W. you will instead usually refer to Wednesday as “your Friday.”

-We see people come to the office on a Monday depressed they have to return to work and that Friday is so far away.
-Tuesday is a little closer to Friday although it is still just after Monday and still part of our recovery.
-Wednesday even gets a nickname of “hump day” as we work our way over the middle point of the week and find ourselves on the downhill towards our weekend
-Thursday is a good day for most people and will be referred to as Friday Eve by many that can now taste the freedom of their weekend.
-T.G.I.Friday finally! A day to get all of those projects done and get on with our weekend and our time.

-Saturday and Sunday seem to fly by much too quickly and we find ourselves back at Monday. Check out more in our blog, Time Flies When…

What if this was different?

What if you taught your child to look forward to going to school on Monday and also appreciating the difference that the weekend brought?

What if when you were in college you looked forward to the diversity in your schedule between course load, any employment you had and the nights of pub crawls and hanging out with friends?

Then imagine the success you could bring to your life and everyone around you as an adult…

-Excited to head into the office on Monday to be with your co-workers and see what changes you could make to help someone in their life that day.
-Tuesday would be just another opportunity to help and spend time at a job you love.
-Wednesday would still be “hump day” and now that would bring you a feeling of joy as you found yourself right in the middle of the week of work.
-Thursday would be a day of success as others around you might be happier and that could add to your ability to help.
-Friday would finally show up and it would be a day of pulling together projects and other loose ends before the weekend was upon you.

-Saturday and Sunday would arrive and you would appreciate the change in schedule. Spending time on other tasks of your choosing, hanging out with your family and friends and maybe even sleeping in or staying up just a little later.

When Sunday night came, instead of dreading heading back to work Monday, you would find happiness in all aspects of your life.

Are you enjoying what you do or are you counting the moments as you wait for the end of the day on Friday?

Chadalyst – Find something that you love about each day of the week. Maybe a show you watch? An after school activity or other weekly event. Celebrate each day to help you find the love for the week as much as the weekend

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