Where we challenge what you won't say or you don't know…yet

TOAST them or you’re toast!

There is a limited number of relationships that each of us can maintain at any one time. The most well known research on this topic was done by Robin Dunbar who states, “humans can only comfortably maintain 150 stable relationships.” He goes on to say that this 150 is “the number of people one knows and keeps social contact with.”

What happens when you meet someone or have a relationship with someone and want to make sure that you keep social contact with them? You have to work at it.

Relationships take work!

You must T.O.A.S.T. your relationships, otherwise your relationships are toast!

burnt toastFor those of you that don’t know the expression, “you’re toast” it is a phrase used to indicate that someone is in big trouble. In this case, your relationships!

While you might be able to have in the area of 150 relationships, you should figure your 30-40 key relationships in your life, both personal and professional (yes that means your spouse, your children, your parents, as well as your boss, co-workers and clients)
If you can remember to take the time to toast each relationship it will be that much easier to strengthen your key relationships.

T = Talk to them.

This means that you must pick up the phone and call them or even better get face to face and spend a little time with them. This doesn’t matter if it is family, a co-worker, or a client that you value. Check in and spend a little time catching up.
What to say when you are talking to them?
O = Offer
A = Assistance
Don’t worry about asking them to help you, instead make the focus of your call about how you can offer assistance to them! They will return the favor again and again as you continue to strengthen the relationship
S = Send them something
See an interesting article online? Email it to them and let them know. Read something in a magazine that they might enjoy reading, send it to them. Find a comic in the Sunday paper (we know you flip to the comics first) that makes you laugh, cut it out and mail it to them. Make sure they continue to get things from you.
T = Text them
In today’s society almost everyone texts. It is an easy way for communication. Start the day with a simple text to wish them a great day. Send off a text to share something that happened. Did you see them post something on Facebook that really caught your attention? Don’t just comment on Facebook, take it a step farther and text them as well.  Just don’t text and drive!
If you can’t remember each month to T.O.A.S.T. your relationships, then they will fall apart and your relationships will be toast.
Take a moment, raise a glass, or in this case a phone, and toast your key relationships and watch them strengthen!

Champagene Toast

 

 

Do you enjoy the information found in these blogs?

Click on the top right of the screen to subscribe and you can be one of the first to receive these updates.

Chadalyst - Go through your database, contact list, social media profiles and figure the 30-40 people who you will be toasting. Start and call the first one today!

Join Chad Hyams on Facebook and on Twitter and share your thoughts.

Success can be yours and it can be easier than you think to achieve it.

The biggest challenge that we have found people face when they are looking to become an overnight success is that they want it to actually happen overnight. There is no such thing as an overnight success. There is always work that must be done.

  • Overnight SuccessThe star athlete that comes out of nowhere probably put hours and hours of training in before you ever heard their name
  • The movie star that was discovered has probably been in acting classes at school or has some small parts on their resume
  • The business person that takes their idea to success, probably has had many jobs helping them get where they are overnight

The overnight success is rarely what it seems.

To achieve success, which you can, all you need to do is find the person a few steps ahead of you and follow them.

Most people are happy to have someone following them, as it pushes them to be better and makes them feel good to share. These same people will be happy for you as you continue to grow, even if that means passing them by. Remember, your level of success might not be the same as their level of success.

Here is an easy way to understand this concept…

Having grown up in a city that experienced snow 10 months of the year, or so it seemed, and never had a snow day from school we learned how to walk to the bus in knee-deep snow. We followed in the footsteps created by the person in front of us even if we couldn’t see them. Once we finally caught up to them, because it was easier for us then it was for them, we passed them and let them follow in our footsteps. If we were smart, we just looked for the next set of footprints to walk in and repeated the pattern.

This is how you create overnight success:

  1. Look for the person heading the same direction as you
  2. Follow in their footsteps until you catch up
  3. Pass them
  4. Find the next person heading in the direction you are now intending to go

Before you know it, you are an overnight success story and there is a line of people walking in your footsteps.

snow footsteps

 

 

Do you enjoy the information found in these blogs?

Click on the top right of the screen to subscribe and you can be one of the first to receive these updates.

 

Chadalyst - Stop what you are doing and find the person you plan to follow. Send them this blog and let them know they came to your mind and you admire their success

 

Join Chad Hyams on Facebook and on Twitter and share your thoughts.

 

CIRCLE Growth

There is always time to improve your relationships in life.

It doesn’t matter if you are in a sales business, run an office, or even are a teacher in a classroom, C.I.R.C.L.E. growth can be yours easily and you will be able to see an increase in your relationships.

When asked, people will usually overstate the depth of a connection they have with others in their life. This doesn’t matter if they are personal or business associations. We, as people, believe that other people will remember us, that they are thinking about us and will be there for us as needed.This statement is even more prominent in the sales world as commissioned sales people believe they have a huge database of people who are always thinking about them.

Sadly this is not true!

Facebook might allow us to have 5000 Friends and while that sounds wonderful, it is a lie. The truth is we should probably change the words a little and have 5000 acquaintances on Facebook. According to studies done by Robin Dunbar and by Bernard–Killworth we see that the average person can have between 100-300 true relationships at any one time. Having a large database is wonderful as long as you remember that without at least quarterly contact, face-to-face or speaking over the phone, you shouldn’t count on those people. Meaning your database can hold many names, only the number that you can speak to each quarter should be counted as true contacts.

Some people have 100 relationships in their lives and would still only name 50 of them if they had to think about it as they stay in a very small circle. At the same time others believe they have thousands of relationships and none of those people would even know who they are. Having a database full of names or a full Facebook account doesn’t mean you have a relationship.

This is where C.I.R.C.L.E. growth comes into play.

CIRCLE growth

Contact to

Increase

Relationships

Creating

Lasting

Engagement

We can take the time to add C.I.R.C.L.E. calls, C.I.R.C.L.E. emails, C.I.R.C.L.E. mailers and more to our day and this will help us develop those connections to a stronger bond.

What do these things consist of? C.I.R.C.L.E. calls

  • speaking to someone
  • talking about THEM
  • NOT talking about your business unless they ask

C.I.R.C.L.E. emails

  • emailing AND getting a reply
  • talking about THEM
  • NOT talking about your business unless they ask

C.I.R.C.L.E. mailers

  • writing it by hand
  • talking about THEM
  • NOT talking about your business unless they ask

Notice a trend? TALK about them and don’t ask about or for business. Check out their Facebook page or look in your notes and have something personal to call them about.

  • Did they go on a vacation?
  • Did they celebrate something special?
  • Did they buy something new?

Remember this…give to give, not give to get. Trust us, you will get back more than you ever thought possible. As you make your C.I.R.C.L.E. calls, emails and mailings all of it will circle back to you. By making these connections and letting them know you are a part of their life through calls, emails and handwritten notes you will gain the mind share you are looking for and you will be able to improve your relationships in life. Improve RelationshipsDo you enjoy the information found in these blogs?

Click on the top right of the screen to subscribe and you can be one of the first to receive these updates.

Chadalyst - Set a schedule and make a C.I.R.C.L.E. call, send aC.I.R.C.L.E. email, and write a C.I.R.C.L.E. mailer today!

Join Chad Hyams on Facebook and on Twitter and share your thoughts.

One Year

one year agoOne year

365 days (at least 75% of the time)

52 weeks

8760 hours

525,600 minutes

You get the idea. A year can be as long or as short as you make it because it never changes on the calendar.

A year ago my life was very different as I lived someplace else, worked someplace else and had many other habits in my daily routine.

What could you do with a year?

  • A home can be built in less than a year
  • Training for a marathon can be accomplished in less than a year
  • A child can be conceived and born in less than a year

According to various studies it takes 66 days to make a habit and that means that in one year you could create at least 5 new habits. You can do more than 5 if you learn more than one habit at a time. Such as working out everyday AND waking up earlier to make the most of each day.

Each year on January 1st we set new goals. We finally make changes for the better. We also make promises that we usually have broken by February 1st. Why wait?

Pick any day and start over, New Year’s Eve doesn’t matter. If you don’t like the path you took today, start again tomorrow and go in a different direction. Just know that if you keep starting over in a different direction you will most likely end up moving in a circle and getting nowhere fast!

Decide where it is you want to be a year from now and step in the right direction.

  • Do you want to weigh less? Start eating right and working out today
  • Do you want to make more money? Start working harder, smarter or searching for the opportunity to earn more.
  • Do you want to get out of debt? Start paying off your smallest debt and working in the right direction.

 

What did your life look like a year ago?

What will it look like in a year?

The Future

 

Do you enjoy the information found in these blogs?

Click on the top right of the screen to subscribe and you can be one of the first to receive these updates.

Chadalyst - Write down what your life will look like next year. Pick the 3 key words from what you have written and post them someplace for you to see daily. Seal the letter in an envelope and look at it in a year.

Join Chad Hyams on Facebook and on Twitter and share your thoughts.

Again and again we hear about this wonderful way to be more efficient in the world of social media. Sadly, SOCIAL media isn’t about being efficient it is about relationships and they take time!

One of the tips and tricks shared with you from many self-proclaimed Gurus, Masters, Rockstars, and Ninjas is to save yourself time and be more efficient by using linking your social media profiles to share updates.

  • Ich verstehe nicht
  • No entiendo
  • ik niet begrijp
  • Je ne comprends pas
  • 我不明白 (Wǒ bù míngbái)

They all mean the same thing…I don’t understand.

I don’t understand why these “experts” think that this is a wise choice at all.

Would you go to China and speak Spanish thinking anyone would understand you? Would you go to Germany and speak French? You either learn the language of where you are going or you understand that there will probably be some communication challenges.

Then why would you go to Twitter and speak Facebook? Or go to Facebook and speak Instagram?

Each social media platform has its own language and must be respected if you want to develop relationships and not just sound like a fool.

  • Twitter is limited to 140 characters
  • Instagram is focused on photos and hashtags
  • LinkedIn is business talk and job searching
  • Facebook is conversational and sharing and bragging and over-sharing

These sites and all of the other social media sites out there, use different languages so UNLINK your social media profiles from each other and speak the correct language for each of them.

Here are some examples of what we are speaking about…

Here is a posting that was made on Facebook and because the accounts are linked you can see how it also posted on Twitter. Notice the hashtags on Facebook that didn’t make it to Twitter? Twitter is the profile to use hashtags on and because these were linked they were lost and the user probably doesn’t even know it!

Facebook to Twitter

Here is someone using Instagram and sharing it on Facebook. We have all heard that images work great on Facebook and still, the hashtags are meant for Instagram and should stay there.Instagram to Facebook

Take the time to speak to people in the correct language and stop attempting to save the 30 seconds it takes to make an additional posting. You will be rewarded with true conversation, better relationships and more success on the social media platforms that you have decided to use.

 

Do you enjoy the information found in these blogs?

Click on the top right of the screen to subscribe and you can be one of the first to receive these updates.

Chadalyst - Go unlink your social media profiles from auto-posting to each other!

Join Chad Hyams on Facebook and on Twitter and share your thoughts.

 

Need help? Recruit it!

Sometimes it doesn’t matter how great you are at something, you still need help to reach the next level.

Bruce the squirrel is one of the most focussed animals I have ever had the chance to observe. Bruce hangs upside down to work the bird feeder and get what he is after. You can learn more about Bruce by reading Focus Found in This, Squirrel.

We solved our Bruce challenge as we moved the bird feeder to a place that no matter what he did he could not reach.Squirrel in tree

  • He jumped and fell
  • He hung upside down and stretched
  • He even bounced on the tree branch hoping to shake the bird feeder loose

Then Bruce finally found the solution he needed. He recruited talent. What does talent look like?

  • Talent has drive of its own
  • Talent has a skill set that you are needing
  • Talent has the ability to think and resolve issues without you

Bruce, found Robin. Robin the Chipmunk came to work with Bruce on solving the challenge of accessing all of the food in the bird feeder. Talent was found.

  • Robin has the same drive to find food and to eat as much as possible
  • Robin was lighter and smaller which allowed him to land on the bird feeder and not fall off
  • Robin was able to figure out the best way to the bird feeder after missing once or twice

Robin is talent and just what Bruce needed to succeed.

Now Robin jumps down from the tree branch and lands on the bird feeder and is light enough and small enough to slip onto the feeding platform without tipping it over. Robin eats until full and then spills extra food to the ground below.

As Robin does all of the hard work, Bruce sits below and waits for the food to fall and eats his unfair share without doing any of the hard work.

What is it in your life that you need to recruit help for?

  • Someone to read books and create summaries for you?
  • Someone to run daily errands and maintain your home?
  • Someone to work with your abundance of clients and make sure your customer service level is kept high?

Talent is out there for you to find. Just remember, talent is probably not sitting around reading online posts for job openings, talent is probably working and if you need help you will probably have to recruit it!

 

Do you enjoy the information found in these blogs?

Click on the top right of the screen to subscribe and you can be one of the first to receive these updates.

Chadalyst - Make a list of the perfect talent for you. Are they young or experienced? Get at numbers or are they creative types? The more specific you can get, the easier it will be to spot them!

Join Chad Hyams on Facebook and on Twitter and share your thoughts.

Rethink Possible

Every now and again we have to reboot the cable box. When it finally restarts, on the blue screen, the AT&T U-verse system always reminds us to Rethink Possible.

While most people will see a logo and a slogan from AT&T and would just impatiently be waiting for their system to reboot, this would normally be me, these words hung on our screen for what seemed like an eternity.

Rethink-Possible-ATT

Rethink Possible. What is possible? What are my thoughts telling me? Without self-limitations what could become possible?

We know the story of the impossible four-minute mile that once broken by Roger Bannister in 1954. While nobody thought it possible and nobody had been able to accomplish this feat, once Roger took a moment to rethink possible and train differently he was able to achieve this goal. Now the four-minute mile is the standard of all male professional middle distance runners.

Of course where would we be today without the Wright brothers, rethinking possible? We would still be traveling on a lot more road trips!

What can you do to rethink possible?

Unlike the Wright brothers and Roger Bannister there is possibly someone who has already achieved what is possible. Reach out to those people and follow the path they have already set out for you. If it is possible for one, it can be possible for you as well.

Other ways to rethink possible:

  • Write down what you think is not possible and then on a different piece of paper write the opposite. Then dispose of the limiting thought.
    I am not able to sell 50 units this year. I will sell 50 units this year. 
  • Break down impossible to see how possible it actually can be.
    50 units this year = 1 unit a week – now focus on something possible like 1 a week instead of the large number of 50 a year
  • Finish something else you were starting to think might not be possible. The accomplishment will help you see how other things are possible.
    Finish that book or home improvement project you have been putting aside. 

Nothing is truly impossible it might just take time, finances or the right people around you to achieve your target. If you rethink possible, you will find that solution.

AT&T might be moving their brand away from Rethink Possible towards Mobilizing Your World to stay with the times and express a different image. Esther Lee, senior vice president for brand marketing, advertising and sponsorship at AT&T, says that “AT&T remains a ‘Rethink Possible’ company and this line will remain our company signature on all corporate assets.”

You might also change your focus once you have achieved your target success because once you learn to rethink possible, you will always be able to rethink possible!

im_possible

 

Do you enjoy the information found in these blogs?

Click on the top right of the screen to subscribe and you can be one of the first to receive these updates.

Chadalyst - RETHINK POSSIBLE – what is something that you have been limiting yourself with? Write your negative and limiting thought on a piece of paper…write the opposite on a different piece of paper…crumple the first limiting thought and throw it away!

Join Chad Hyams on Facebook and on Twitter and share your thoughts.

 

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 11,226 other followers